Troyisme

   Okay, long time no post on my blog. Anyone miss me? Haha. :P *still in confident mode.

   Well, I've been trying so hard to be more diligent to post my blog, but it's all about my time. Actually, I've been so busy since Freshman Orientation two months ago. But...okay okay. I'm not going to tell you about my activities. I'm going to tell you about my serious disease that I suffered around year 2009. But I guess I still suffer it though it has a little frequency. I named it as TROYISME.

   How could I name it as troyisme?
   A simple answer: because the one who made me suffered it was a guy that I called with TROY. But, this disease isn't that simple just like my answer. It's totally complicated. How come? Well, check my post out!

   Maybe, I've told you about someone who I called with Troy. He is my first love. Okay, I have to be honest that I had liked him for around 8 years. It was so crazy remembering sooo long time I admired him so much. Not only admired, but also like, love, and whatever you call to a feeling from a woman to a man, and vice versa. And because it had been 8 years, can you imagine how hard your struggle to stand is when you know it's impossible to stand longer? It must be so hard, so painful, whereas you were still a little girl. I admired him, I loved him, but I knew my love was a unrequited love. But I expected a miracle so much. And that expectation built a disease that I called with TROYISME.

   Maybe you thought troyisme is such a psycho. But it is not. The characteristics of this disease are the same like the characteristic when you are falling in love. I keep thinking about this feeling, I keep thinking about him. I cry, and then suddenly I smile, then I am angry. When he sent me a message, I shouted, became so crazy. No word could describe my feeling. Actually, when I knew he was in a relationship with his girlfriend, I could forget about him. But you know, it was hard. Just like you try to pull a steel nail that was embedded on the wall for 8 years. And you keep expecting a miracle that was hard to come true.

   But I had a doctor who could cure this disease. And he was a gift from God to me. I called him Chad. Why a gift from God?

   First, because I knew and liked in him less than a month. It's such a miracle for me because I'm kind of a girl who can't easily like someone who I've just known. Second, he almost became my second love in less than one a half months. Third, he dropped me from the infinite height in less than 3 months. Fourth, I hated him in less than 6 months since we met. Fifth, I forget him in less than six a half months. And I regret to know him in less than 5 months! It's my second broken heart. I think he is a heartbreaker. And maybe yes, he is. But I don't get along with that broken-heart situation, at least not for a long time just like before. I know I have to stand up and move forward for my better life. I don't wanna waste my times just to cry for somebody who is nothing for me.
   Then about troyisme, maybe this disease is not cured permanently. It still exist deep in my heart. Sometimes, when there's something that is connected with troy, this disease can  appear. And I have to keep controlling my feeling as well. This disease, I don't know, can be cured permanently or not. Wish it could.